I’ve had an unplanned month off of medical appointments and procedures and it has been amazing! I had forgotten how much stress my autoimmune life adds to me. The hustle and bustle of having multiple appointments every week gets to be too much to deal with sometimes, and I sincerely enjoyed the break from it all. Like all good things, it had to come to an end. I have an important appointment coming up on Monday. I see the gynecologist to discuss the possibility of a hysterectomy and I’ve got to say, I’m a bit nervous to have this conversation. I’m not even sure if I want a hysterectomy anymore. In a lot of cases of interstitial cystitis, the hysterectomy actually worsens the bladder pain. I’m just not sure what I want to do at this point. I’m curious as to what the doctor’s opinion will be.
In the Urology department, I am still waiting for insurance to approve the cystoscopy with hydrodistention. I’m hoping to hear back soon and get that scheduled. I have a friend with interstitial cystitis and she was helped in a very big way with that particular procedure. Of course, I have also talked to people who said their pain got worse after this procedure. I’m just so tired of the pain and I’m willing to try just about any procedure that might help. I’m beyond willing to take a gamble on this procedure even though it absolutely terrifies me. Fingers crossed that I’m one of the lucky ones who finds relief with it.
I’ve been trying to keep it together mentally, and in all honesty, that has been the hardest battle for me lately. When I get in these flares, I get really down and depressed. It has gotten bad enough in the past that I’ve had to reach out to others for help, which is one of the most difficult things to do in that moment! I’ve been in a good place mentally for the last week or so, but my flares are finally letting up just a little bit. It’s been nice to be able to get things done without crying out in agonizing pain on a daily basis. I’m slowly learning to enjoy my good days and make good use of them. Now I just have to learn how to cope with the bad days.
I won the battle against my gastroenterologist and am scheduled for my EGD or Upper Endoscopy the week after next… On the 21st of July. I am still irritated that I had to fight as hard as I did and lose as much weight as I did before she would listen to me, but I am glad that I advocated for myself and my health needs. Now I just hope that they can find and fix the problem for me.
It’s Summertime and that means my kids are out of school. I’ve been trying to enjoy time with my boys, but they’ve been busy working this Summer and just don’t have time for their old mom anymore. It’s been bittersweet. I love seeing them turn into little men, but more and more I miss the babies that they once were. I feel like I closed my eyes to blink and here we are all these years later and I’m just wondering where the heck did the time go? My mother warned me that this would happen and despite my best efforts, she was right. Time slipped right on by me and it’s showing no signs of letting up any time soon.
Stay blessed everyone! Love and light now and always!